my mouth tastes like poor choices
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
