Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
