I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
