Define "chronic" masturbator.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
it was like eating out sand paper
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
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