for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
you win again, gameday.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize