he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize