I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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