in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize