My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
