Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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