its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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