Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
