If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Randomize
