I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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