so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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