that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
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