I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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