Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
