we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You made out with two different species that night
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
We don't watch enough power rangers
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
