If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
