Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
