I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
