have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
