I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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