bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize