I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize