Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
