yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
No...this little piggys going to the bar
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
