if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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