16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
