We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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