her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
