we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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