I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Sex in the backyard? Check.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
