So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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