I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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