My cat gives me a boner
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
