I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
