In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
