do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
