I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
