If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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