this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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