I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
