3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
