Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
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