there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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