Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
