All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize