Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
the day after is always just damage control
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
